Pump It Till You Dump It! The Lovehoney Blowmotion Squeezable Review

I remember that Tuesday. After finishing work and taking a sip of some chicken soup (no worries, I wasn’t sick or whatever), I felt a little spent. I needed a good wank, for sure, but all of the products that normally satisfy me felt a little stale. After all, you can only use a pocket pussy so many times before it starts to bore you. And so, knowing that I needed a bit of change in my life, I took to Google and started browsing. Surely, there must be a decent toy out there that can do the deed without a lot of effort, right?As if by providence, Lovehoney came to the rescue. Looking through their catalog, I found a device I hadn’t really tested yet, the nifty-looking Blowmotion Squeezable male masturbator. After testing it out several times, I find myself confident enough to write my thoughts on its performance and whether or not it’s worth the money. And voila! One Blowmotion Squeezable review later, and here we are, ready and able.

So, let’s dive in, dick-deep, into the Blowmotion Squeezable and see what’s what, shall we?

Lovehoney’s Track Record With Marky-Mark

“But Mark”, I hear you say, “I’ve seen what the Squeezable is! Don’t you know, good sir, that there are far better Lovehoney products on the market right now?”. Why, yes, astute reader, I am well aware of all the masturbatory miracles that this brand has gifted the world over the years. In fact, I can safely say that I am both a huge fan (well, mid-sized fan, to be honest) and a somewhat knowledgeable connoisseur of Lovehoney’s finest.

Let’s dig back a little. One of the first devices I got off of Lovehoney was the Hot Shot blowjob masturbator. My frequent readers will recall just how much mileage I got out of this device. It was such a positive experience that I kept recommending the device to all of my sex-positive friends. And they nearly all bought it and bought INTO it. I think the strongest selling point of that device was its shape; it was so unique and uncharacteristic that people became curious about its performance. Needless to say, the look worked well in its favor.

My second stint was with a Blowmotion product, the Blowmotion Winged masturbator. If the shape of the Hot Shot got your attention, then this bad boy would blow your mind, as well as blow you in general. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything like it up to that point. And with the number of speeds and options it provided, this sucker had me cumming in minutes.

Finally, I gave the Blowmotion Real Feel a try. Out of all the Lovehoney products thus far, this one gave me the most pleasure. It felt so similar to a real vagina that I found myself using it several times a day, sometimes even within the same hour.

The Squeezable, at First Glance

With my Lovehoney backstory out of the way, let’s focus on the latest item from this brand that ended up in my collection. I’ve said this in my older reviews, but it bears repeating. I absolutely LOVE that Lovehoney packages its items in discreet, unmarked boxes. Nobody but me has to know just how naughty I am unless they want to join in on the action. Well, one brown, slender package later, and the Squeezable was in my possession.

Plucking this boy out of the box, I could tell it was fairly bulky. Now, obviously, I prefer my toys to be a little on the light side, so I can actually hold one in my hand and fiddle around with it. Luckily, the Squeezable didn’t feel too heavy, which is immediately a plus.

The plastic outer casing was smooth and well-sculpted. I remember buying several knock-off products off of dodgy websites just to compare them to the originals. And good God, those things could look horrendous! I bring them up simply to illustrate why having a well-sculpted, smoothed shell makes all the difference. Namely, whoever was casting the cases of those knock-off brands must have used a shoddy mold. They were as coarse and rough around the edges as one can get.

Luckily, Lovehoney items do not have such an issue, and I could have spent hours just admiring the device as it was. But the show must go on, and I needed to feel this gadget around my stiff member, pronto.

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What Exactly Does the Squeezable Offer?

A Build Built for the Best

Material-wise, the outer casing is made out of durable plastic. It’s soft enough to move around, light enough not to weigh too much, but sturdy to the point of not breaking under too much pressure. In other words, it’s standard fare for the company.

Of course, what interests all of you is the inner chamber. Opening up the case (which is incredibly easy, by the way; it’s like opening a plastic box of screws), we find a transparent set of internal canal pads. Obviously, I gave them a quick touch or two just to see how they felt against the skin. And the feeling was divine. I’ve extolled the benefits of soft plastic in my older reviews, and I intend to do so again. This material is so close to feeling like human skin that it’s unreal, and every single device that contains soft plastic is the one that made me cum harder than any silicone variant.

I should mention that, according to the company itself, the pads don’t contain any harmful phthalates, but they do have traces of latex. In and of itself, latex isn’t toxic or harmful, but there are users who might be allergic. So, if I had to list any negatives of this device, it would be this tiny amount of potentially harmful material to some users anyway.

It’s All in the Pressure

The whole point of the Squeezable is, and you never would’ve guessed it from the name alone — the squeezing. Each pad has two chambers of equally spaced circular nubs that point upward. Considering that the insertable length of this beast is 6.5 inches or 16.5 centimeters, it works perfectly for cocks of different sizes and girths. Hell, it worked on mine fairly well, and I’m not that hung. But the fact that the nubs are lining the entirety of the device’s length makes the experience ten times more interesting.

And yet, it’s not just the nubs that apply the pressure. The main piece of the Squeezable is the external pressure pads. By giving them a squeeze or two during the session, you get an extra amount of oomph, as it is meant to simulate the constrictions that a vagina makes on the inside. Now, the constriction would be fine enough on its own, but combined with the nubs? There are no words to describe how perfect it is.

The position of the pads is also important. There are two at the top and two at the bottom, giving me multiple ways of pleasuring myself. I can either apply pressure to my glans or my base or both at once. Furthermore, I can alternate between pressure points, intensity, and frequency. It’s a versatile toy, for sure, and the simple design of the pads greatly helps that.

Cost-Effective Cum Catcher

Normally I try not to bring up the issue of price in my reviews. After all, if you’re someone who spends a lot of time trying out different masturbation toys, the price is just a number, right? However, I do realize that there are some costly masturbators out there. Hell, I’ve even seen a few that sell for multiple thousands of dollars. As tempting as that may seem, I really don’t want to spend that big of a sum for a toy that might end up cluttering my cupboard in a few months, tops.

Instead, I always go for the reasonable route. Does this toy offer me plenty of options? Will I get enough bang for my buck? How often can this device break down, and if so, is it worth paying for? That kind of thinking may have slowed down my progress in finding the best sex toy, but it has taught me how to be cost-effective and choose the best for what the brand is selling it.

Having said that, I must stress that this masturbator is one of the least costly on the market. I wouldn’t call it cheap, but it boasts a reasonable price even without the promo periods and discounts. In other words, it’s $60 well spent, and I don’t regret a single penny.

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No Electricity?!

For those of you who haven’t surmised it yet, let me just state it outright — this masturbator is 100% manual use. There are no batteries, no cables, no recharging, and no smart app connectivity. In terms of features, it is as bare-bones as it gets. And I get why some people might not like that, so just for the sake of completeness, I will count it as a negative. I personally disagree with that rating, but I fully understand that some people prefer everything to be automatic.

However, I will defend the fact that Squeezable is analog and doesn’t really need any juice. As I stated several times earlier, the design choices behind the Squeezable are more than enough to help a man achieve an orgasm. Furthermore, the mere fact that it doesn’t require recharging or a smartphone factors into the low price. So, if you can cum for a fraction of the cost of other toys, all while saving electricity, then why not give the Squeezable a chance? I did, and I loved it through and through.

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And Now for Our Feature Presentation

Well, we’ve covered the look and feel of the Squeezable, and we’ve discussed its design and performance, but now let’s see just how well it fares during masturbation.

So, when I was prepping myself for a joyride, I had to tick a few boxes. First, I needed lube. Water-based products are a dime a dozen, and I always have some handy, so that was taken care of quickly. Next came the position. I was on my back, the Squeezable was in my hand, and my manhood was waiting on the yank.

And yank away, I did. The initial penetration of the device did feel a bit odd, considering how snug it is. But the second I started feeling those nubs on the inside, I was eager for more. My first session was entirely pad-free. I wanted to see if the nubs themselves would do the job, and fifteen minutes later, I was right.

Next came the pad test. After a thorough cleaning and a minor break, before I got hard again, I reapplied the lube and went to town with the Squeezable. Of course, now I was using the bottom pads to see how well it gripped my base. It was divine, like a cock ring that enjoys teasing the user! Upper pads were next, and I can safely say that no toy has teased my tip as much as this one. Again, within fifteen minutes, I was spurting out white liquid en masse.

Alternating between pads was my final test, and I can tell that this part was my favorite. Going between the pressure on top and the one on the bottom was exhilarating, and though it took me a little longer to ejaculate, I enjoyed each and every second.

From a Mess to Meticulousness

Because of its shape and size, the Blowmotion Squeezable is incredibly easy to clean. All I have to do is open the device, take the pads out, and rinse them under some hot water. The same goes for the plastic casing. There might be some slight issues when it comes to the spaces between the nubs, but that’s nothing that a Q-tip or a strong, thin gush of water can’t fix.

I always stress that cleaning the product is important, especially if you’re a frequent user. Semen and unwashed lube accumulate over time, and that can speed up the deterioration of the material. Ergo, never forget to sink those devices into some hot water (or, if they’re electronic, just dip the sleeve itself).

 

 

So, How Does the Blowmotion Squeezable Fare?

With an easy-to-use pad squeezing system, open access to the sleeve, and being relatively uncomplicated when it comes to cleaning, the Blowmotion Squeezable is an excellent product. Combine that with a reasonable price, and you have a toy that you will want to use for hours. So don’t delay! Get yourself a Blowmotion Squeezable and find out what kind of vibes a fine gadget like this one makes.

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Product Specs:

🏷️ Name:	⭕ Blowmotion Squeezable
📁 Type:	⭕ Pocket Pussies
⚙️ Features:	⭕ External pressure pads for extra stimulation
🛠️ Materials:	⭕ TPE
📅 Last updated:	⭕ November 29, 2023