When it comes to sex, positions matter.
You probably associate feng shui, the Chinese philosophy of harmonizing your own life with your surroundings, with that time in high school when your mom started frantically repositioning the La-Z-Boy sofa. But according to clinical sexologist and couples’ therapist Dr. Kat Van Kirk, designing your bedroom so that it creates positive flows of energy (or “chi”) can actually enliven your sex life. We’ve been hiding under several feet of snow, mothy sweaters, inches of leg hair, and dusty floors for many months now. Spring seems like the perfect opportunity to take on some feng shui practices and make our personal living spaces as sex-friendly as possible. Whether you believe in feng shui or not, most of Dr. Kat’s tips will still make your bedroom a whole lot more inviting for an overnight guest.
Stop Hoarding
No clutter. There needs to be a free flowing area for the chi (energy) to circulate. Especially around the center of the room which is the center of the chi for the entire space.
Change Up Your Bed Linens
While some of our first instincts to sexify a bed might include a new bright red duvet cover and hot pink sheets, that is the opposite direction you want to go in. The bedroom is an area of yin space. This means that you want to decorate the room with cool, calm colors. Muted tones like lavender, blues and greens can help you achieve this.
Resist the Urge to Hang a Mirror Near Your Bed
Besides the fact that it’s pretty tacky, hanging a mirror over or beside your bed completely throws off the energy of a room. Generally, Feng Shui principles shy away from having a mirror in the bedroom – so, no mirrors over the beds folks. Mirrors can activate chi in a room and sometimes make them too stimulating.
Make Your Bed the Focal Point
When someone comes into your bedroom and all you want is for them to get in your bed, it makes perfect sense that you should set up your room so all eyes lead to the bed. Feng Shui suggests that the foot of the bed always faces the entry of the doorway. This way the bed does become the focal point of the room while balancing energies. Just don’t put the bed under a window. This disturbs the chi by making the bed too exposed and can cultivate a feeling of being unsafe.
Decorate in Twos
This might sound like an odd suggestion, but avoid hanging any art that features a single, lone figure. Save your Edward Hopper paintings for the living room. Decorating in twos can also help to create positive partner energy. This includes everything from pictures of lovers embracing to setting up duos of plants or candles in the room.
Put Flowers by the Bed
If you want to improve your sex life, Dr. Kat suggests bringing actual life into the room. That means fresh flowers, soothing floral aromatherapies like candles and incense, and even pictures of flowers and landscapes can help to embrace the newness of spring and create positive energy in your bedroom.
Clear Out Reminders of Your Unsexy Life
Clutter, especially under the bed, can stifle chi when it comes to lovemaking. Also, lots of pictures of family can be off-putting and are not in alignment with creating a sexual sanctuary in the bedroom. That means making room on your bed, too. Stay away from over decorating your bed with too many pillows or god forbid, stuffed animals.
